I had some incredibly exciting news this weekend – a publisher of romance e-books is interested in my manuscript! It’s the news I’ve been waiting for for, ooh, about five years and it’s beyond thrilling.
I don’t want to say too much at this stage in case they a) decide it’s been a terrible mistake and sent me the email instead of the intended recipient (you never know!) or b) the editor who likes it runs off to join the circus and her successor doesn’t know what she saw in it (again, you never know).
After the initial elation I thought about what having my work out there in public actually means. Of course it means having a lovely front cover, being able to say – finally – that I’m a published author (woo-woo) and, frighteningly, it means people are going to be able to read my book – woah, scary.
There are heart-felt heavy emotional scenes, there is death, marriage, fall-ins and fall-outs and yes, there are rudey bits. My friends are going to read it, the mums on the school run are going to read it, the people I expect to respect me at work are going to read it, my mother and her friends are going to read it. It’s like standing on a stage in public and telling everyone what goes through your naughty little mind.
But that’s not the worst scenario – what if no-one reads it! Aaargh, that’s definitely worse than having everyone think I’m a dirty little minx!
Blimey, this writing malarkey poses an interesting dilemma, one I never really considered before getting to this stage.
Putting all insecurities aside, being ‘this’ close (pinches finger and thumb together) to becoming a real author is exhilarating and as for worrying about readers getting a glimpse into what makes you tick, then bring it on!